nothing like a tattoo of a large eagle attacking a small eagle whos attacking a shark to bond to siblings together for life
Everything gets a little fuzzy after the flats of jello shots, but I do have a vague recollection of being at the top of a large human pyramid
And before you get all mad cause I said "nipples," I actually discarded "you are so wet right now" and "you have such a raging clit-on right now."
That's called being sensitive.
Just the amount of girls he locked himself in my room woth says your gonna have to take a cab bro. I don't think he's going anywhere
That man gives me hope. I can't help it. And by "hope" I mean "wood."
After she asked if she could try to fit her toe ring around it, i decided to leave. Thats the life i live
I think it's time for a new pick up line. So far my " hey you want to go back to my place, order a pizza and fuck?" Has set me at an all time low downtown 0/4
The only person I have to bring is crazy hospital guy
HE'S NOT INVITED!!!
woke up and somehow me leather belt got torn in half. either we partied with the hulk or some chick just could not wait to see my dick. probably the former tho
I've never seen so much of my blood outside me. After the initial shock it was kind of cool.
She pinched my nipples too hard I THINK THEYRE GONE
I TOLD YOU ABOUT GOTH CHICKS BRO. I WARNED YOU
I just talked with someone about real estate trends in Atlanta then got three blowjobs in a row. Boom.
And ANOTHER guy that I once got naked is doing gay porn now. Wtf? Am I the audition?!
so i may or may not have just had sex on the stage of the lecture hall....
then he said the sex was mediocre and that it was because of me. and that we could try again tomorrow.
it was 100% mediocre because of him, and we will 100% not be trying again tomorrow.
Randomize