I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
Funny, my mom didn't get it when I said 'that's what she said' after she said 'it's so thick, it's impossible' in reference to my milkshake
You should have seen the look on the cashiers face when I was buying steel reserve with a suit on.
You asked the dj to play 'who let the dogs out" because it was your birthday. You left the bar and then re-entered to the song
Apparently I added "small children" to my likes on facebook. glad to know that's where my subconscious is at.
I just don't have the heart to tell my mom you peed in our washer machine last night.
She just tried to snort granola up her nose but its ok she's not bleeding.
Think I pulled my pelvic muscle.
I think I pulled my ashamed of myself muscle.
While we were driving she just screams from the backseat: MUMFORD AND SONS DROP THE BANJO and made what were meant to be banjo sound effects
how the hell were we supposed to out run the cops in a bus?
I wore home his HoHoHo boxers. I've never felt such a connection to an article of clothing.
You know you're doing college wrong when you have to bail your RA out of jail
Fair warning: I will be throwing corn dogs at you every time I see you this week.
I'm wearing a fleece onesie eating pop tarts on the train to work. Killing it.
I have hobbies that aren't destroying myself and others...i can make hats.....
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