i think the semi hot bartender might actually be a man in drag..on a similar note, what are you drinking?
so i completely puked my brains out. a lot. he held me up so i could brush my teeth. then we proceeded to hook up for the next four hours.
he's a keeper
so when i dont talk to her she talks to herself...idk whats worse
Only your wife would write 'for deposit only' on the back of that $1500 check knowing full and well our capabilities of spending it on strippers and booze
He just walked up to be, grabbed my boob and said 'i think they have shrunk' i have no idea who he was.
Fuckkkk i made out with a freshman.....but he's old for his age. THIS IS WHAT HAPPENS WHEN YOURE NOT AROUND.
Left my card at the bar and had a drunk girl climb on the hood of my running car to scream at me.
Can we make a pact that if we're 40 and still sluts that aren't married we can get civil unioned the fuck up and raise an asian baby as our own?
Drinking Fireball means never having to say you're sorry. Unless its at you're arraignment.
I'm sorry, the person you're trying to reach is WAYYY too high to deal with this right now.
I basically gave Miranda rights to the guy I hooked up with, jus so we were all clear what was happening
fuck you I'm eating salad I can't be drunk.
Can't tell if waking up covered in easy mac is the sign of an amazing or terrible night
So, anyways, aside from wanting to seduce my roommate for booze, how's everything been
Thought for a game. Duck, Duck, Grey Goose. If you're tapped, you take a shot. Then proceed as normal.
Randomize
