How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
I'm pretty sure his head is too big to fit between my legs. Worthless.
I’m once again drinking at eight am on a Sunday in my tutu. This garment is literally my best purchase ever.
Missing a small section of hand. Hope your night is going better
i just did the math...im a product of my mothers birthday sex
Fine. Just this once and because its veterans day will I send you a picture of my tits. You're lucky I love this country.
about to tell this girl that sh'es my teenage dream. you have 15.358s to stop me.
filling out my bracket based on schools with ppl I've hooked up with
it was really awkward meeting your mom for the first time while i was still wearing the condom we were using.
I'm high, watching "Scream" and eating a grilled cheese sandwich off my boobs. I'm not going anywhere
Come on, clusterfuck. Put on a pushup bra and get your fine ass to the bar, or you will be a sad single stoner forever
He cried & told me I reminded him off his mother. I don't want to talk about it. I want to drink about it.
When you wake up with a bow tie and mustache drawn on your penis, you know you had a good night.
Hi I'm on my way to give you multiple screaming orgasms and Easter candy
Is it ok to bone a former patient who is also a client? Since it is two negatives does that cancel and become a positive?
The cops asked Ben if he was drunk and he slurred "I'm man enough to admit that I am" with a southern draw
Randomize
