Hurry. And bring back up. SHE WON'T STOP TALKING.
Do you know how easy it would be to shoplift if I was a magician?!
please tell me you remember why "7 days" is written above my bed in red marker
I mean, there was frosting being put on a tunafish sandwich. Pretty sure she knew we were high.
We made a trail of cheez balls so we knew how to get back to te apartment.
Well as our DD it was my responsibility to get us home safely. If that meant strapping you down to the backseat using all 3 seatbelts then so be it.
When I ask you to make sure no ones coming while I'm changing.. The logical friend would keep watch. But you my, best friend come stand in front of me and flash everybody.
I'm venturing to your corner of this sin house in t minus 2 minutes.
He stole a bottle of grenadine from the bar. And got arrested. His new cell mate is going to love his bright red lips.
You say you're gonna take rehab seriously... but i keep imagining it as a training montage for you preparing to snort all of columbia.
That actually is really sweet of you
Are you alive?
I woke up under the pier.
I managed to get through my meeting without throwing up in someone else's office, so there's that for an accomplishment today.
Her tits are absolutely massive. Like ripleys believe it or not shit
We had sex on his grandparents floor... the taxidermy deer was staring at me the whole time!
She was shaving her legs in the neighbors pool when we found her.
Where'd she get the razor?
Not the point.
Randomize
