I just found all of my Mary-Kate and Ashley movies. Can you say drinking game?
I feel like banging her is an expected thing. But banging you would be like getting a 36 on the ACT.
She stopped mid hookup to ask me if we'd be done before Taco Bell closed.
Triple a is towing cars for free tonight and tomorrow night. Can we take advantage of this ?
Sounds good. I will just get tanked here and wear this batman mask.
Idk. The last coherent text said something about $25 & dimes. And then...it's just letters...
Just got outta the drunk tank! Happy 21st birthday!
So I was thinking for Halloween I'd do Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde....for my vagina.
There is nothing quite so pathetic as sitting in bed in your underwear eating easy mac in complete silence, waiting for Netflix to load
I creeped him on fb. I'm about 90% sure I just blew him in the same tux he wore for his wedding..
yea talk to her if you feel up to it. Just remember who you are
Oh shit sorry I just gave lion king advice sorry not mufasa
she's fucked both of my roommates but not me. i feel like I'm not part of the group anymore
I just remembered I made you punch yourself in the face last night and I would like to formally apologize for that even though it was hilarious.
fucked him on the porch to avoid the chanting that always happens when we leave the bedroom. backfired when a group of freshman walked by and started screaming like fucking babies.
I woke up with your bra on, and some guys boxers. I'm in a random truck, in the middle of nowhere...
Randomize
