i think i have reached a jessica simpson level of regret
I think she would actually eat a penis if anyone was brave enough to let one near her mouth
She has more profile pics than tagged pics. narcissism at its best.
I'm at the grocery store, it's 10 am and the woman in front of me just bought 3 boxes of wine. She turned around and told me not to be afraid
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just learned in bio that our sole purpose for life is to have sex.. so your high number is acceptable. its actually lacking.
All she said was "the usual?" and unzipped my pants.
Sex with him was like teaching a two year old how to work a machine gun
On the bright side, nobody died. Please bring me back my left shoe. I have work in an hour.
Lucas & I had a photo shoot with her cape & I had child arm floaties on most the night.. woke up in a spiderman bed
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The best revenge is living well. Or pooping in his sunroof. Either or
Is it bad that i wanna bang this girl ONLY because she looks like my cousin?
my entire left arm went numb
you need to get that checked to make sure you're not wired to have strokes instead of orgasms
They are going to name an STD after you.
As a friend tho, you have the biggest dick I've ever seen
Drunk sperm are not productive sperm.
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