great time with ya sorry i wasn't one of the three guys you wanted to stay with
hows the new call of duty?
I only had sex with the game case so far, but that part was awesome.
Chicago was legit, ate some badass pizza and gave a cig to a crackhead..its all i thought it would be
Taking jello shots out of a big bowl from a measuring spoon. holla atcha boy.
MRIs the morning after St. Patty's Day was a poor choice.
i want you to know that after i type the word "your" , vagina is next on my auto correct text
They left me stranded on the side of the road with a table and five gallons of water. They said it was all I really needed to survive. People are staring
Next time he asks to wax your nipple while you're passed out I promise I'll be sober enough to intervene.
most of the afternoon was spent sneaking around my house and alternating which bathrrom to throw up in.
Shits getting dirty between us in her dad's bedroom. I'm talking early millennium rap and r&b
I have chafed skin from the handy she gave me. I told her that and she said return the favor when it heals. I'm in love.
IM TRYING TO SAY GOODNIGHT STOP FOR LIKE FIVE SECONDS WITH THE DICK SUCKING
I got the beer and the first aid kit. You get the tequila and burn cream. We should be set for the camping trip.
I think this is the first time I heard a lesbian version of baby it's cold outside.
Howd last night go?
well he stumbled in my parents door drunk and then asked my mom if she was my grandma. Id say as far as first impressions go, he failed miserably
Randomize
