is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
If it makes you feel any better I'm plucking my mustahce and drinking. Alone.
eating raw peppers to burn the taste of semen out of my mouth
In hindsight maybe we should have moved his homework instead of playing quarters on top of it.
okay, prove you're not drunk to me. write 5 true sentences about me with correct grammar.
I am sober. Because I don't drunk. It is bad. People die. I like Domenico because o he bag women what up?
I'don't know who your are but its that time a day. Drunk it up. Did you buy a House for goundhogs days?
No I'm not coming over. That Bob Ross drinking game is too intense.
She's drunk as hell locked up I. The bathroom with my shoes where do I go from here
She just drunkenly falls over and yells " I lost my footing!" in a british accent and then proceeds to run into the wall... did you spike her water?
I think he should just go away to a small penis island and never come back
Feels like I ran a marathon last night. A tequila marathon.
Ohhh the usual. Laying in bed reflecting on my decisions
I just got yelled at by a stripper for being a tease.
This is bullshit, I shit my pants for the 1st time in 30 years, stuck on the 405, fuck this shit.
Depends
Wait... where the hell did you even find a live OCTOPUS, let alone green eggs and ham?
Randomize
