I just woke up in bed next to my teacher. Does that mean I'm passing now?
I will never try to masturbate with americas funniest home videos playing in the background ever again
she's sitting here naked with heels and a taco.
Not till Sunday. I'm going to sleep in my car. And I know. This place is insane. Blood on the stAirs 5 dollar slices of pizza. A girl on our floor had a stroke.
sorry for allegedly lighting the beer pong balls of fire
Going to.goingto.gtoing to DIE DIE DIEEEE......i feel like everyeone impotrant in my life like MLK is judging me.... saddd day
yeah I'm sure your grandparents are the best but it's halloween. get a slutty costume and let's go ham.
After seeing how much you are able to funnel in a night, I am 90% sure your blood is pure gin.
Ran into him again last night, stole his glowstick and walked away. The glowstick mountain in my room keeps growing.
Oh my god. That was the best half-hour of my life that didn't involve genitals.
I feel like one thing if I have going for me is that my bed looks like a nice place to have sex
Here's to not getting arrested this year on thanksgiving again. Cheers bitches!
I wanna eat mushrooms and cuddle with a million dogs at once. I wanna know what heaven is like
She said to call her, so I called her. Her boyfriend answered and traced the fucking call. I could litterally hear him yell because it turns out he lives in 4d
Don't you live in 4c?
I didn’t say it was classy, I said it was sexy
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