I am pretty sure the guy in the stall two dwn from me is jerking it...seriously
i've counted 4 condom wrappers but only 3 condoms. not again.
FYI... At my funeral, it will be your job to throw yourself dramatically onto my casket.
If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
Just wondering did you put mouse traps and brownies on my porch?
The best part is when you puked in your slurpree and the 7 eleven guy still made you pay for it
If we break up, I want weekend visitations with your penis.
You haven't had the true md experience until you've had your crotch grabbed by a drunk stripper with a snaggle tooth in front of your coworkers.
Just fucked a MILF from Alaska. I love traveling.
Yea... The gym isn't gunna happen today... When I was drunk last night I tried to prove I could front flip off the wheel cover of a semi... I fucked up my shoulder pretty bad... It was more of a roll
I had a dream about that dude. It was the first time I had a dream about him since the tryst.
The tryst?
The hookup. I like using sophisticated words for my foolish decisions. Makes me retain some dignity.
Went home w the NY Islander in a NY Rangers jersey, needless to say he was pissed
I found the guy I hooked up with last night on Wikipedia, at least now I know how old he is.
I think the God that I only kind of believe in, definitely hates me.
I’m lazy so obviously looking like a rotisserie chicken is my favourite position
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