Question. A woman tells her guy she's on birth control. Stops taking it to have a kid to force the guy to be responsible and with her. What rights does that guy have
None he's f-d
I'd wear matching sweaters with you
think i got pink eye from a stripper in vegas. showgirls did not prepare me adequately for this. be kind, 2010.
What? Cold floors are soothing when you have a hangover. How am I supposed to pass that up. Even if I'm at my parents house
His roomates just started party boying me. He stood there with the look of horror on his face.
I have had more skin than food in my mouth the last three days
New discovery: pineapple flavored vodka. Life made, liver in jeopardy. Graduation t-minus 50 minutes.
Some lady old enough to be our mom took us home, made me eggs and he still got some. Where do I claim my best wingman/sister trophy?
MY BRAIN IS OSCILLATING. DOES THAT EVEN MAKE SENSE
Then that means he's outwardly conservative. Inwardly he's a total gay horndog. He's like a spy that can ruin conservative plans.
I want to change all my life goals to that.
He's only done it missionary. His world is about to be rocked. Do you know what I look like from behind?
All I'm saying is that any 24 year old guy who sends me a snapchat from the vantage point of his dick with the caption "hiding behind my weiner" is off my list potentially dateable guys.
He convinced the breakfast vendor to melt twix bars on bacon for me at 4am. He slurred every word. I think I found my prince charming.
I think the only context in which I'd be comfortable being kidnapped is by a band of baby sloths
i don't find him as attractive when he's dressed as himself...bring back Indiana jones and I would so fuck him again
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