The pirates hijacked 3 more ships today!!
we need a boat to join in
Obama is on top of it we'd get killed within mins, but we'd live in legend foreva
I have to collect my sorority sisters from greek row... I hate how being dd is a night and morning job
her facebook pictures are like a timeline of all the guys she's screwed.
we fucked the fort apart but we'll rebuild it after we get some drinks.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I got concerned once i realized you weren't there to hear us having sex. See I do worry about you.
Just keep my face away from hard objects. And by that I do not mean erect penised.... those are totally fine. It's more just things like rocks, table edges, blunt objects, etc so I don't get another concussion.
Water skiing blazed is the most scary thing I've ever done.
You came home with a traffic cone and said, "this is my birthday condom."
I went full Overly Attached Girlfriend. You never go full OAG.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm still confused. So he's NOT your cousin by blood, but WAS your cousin, on two separate occasions, by marriage? Still too weird I think...
We walked in and someone handed her an unopened bottle of jack with her name on it. She's like a drunken celebrity.
This country song on the radio just had a rap break. What. No. Why.
I thought my sex drive was gone but let me tell you it is back with a vengeance
I still can't believe that dog licked my nipple.
I've scurried myself in your trunk come find me in the morning
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