Wow, you were right... Weed does start conversations
I guess there's some 16 and under softball tournament and they all are at my work. what is a 21 year old to do?
The responsible thing...show them the break room.
Our kitchen sink faucet is leaking, so I set a pitcher under it to catch water for Kool-Aid tomorrow rather than turn on the faucet. The environment owes me.
After she cried and passed out at four in the morning, I had a very lovely, very drunken conversation with her mother while decorating a cake into the shape of a penis.
That's because "bed time" is my sex playlist. If you're trying to fall asleep use "nap time"
I swear they were about to hook up!!
I know because I was in the tub taking an imaginary silent bath. They stopped cuz I gagged on my shot.
Just saw a huge group of people walk by in there in their underwear. Too stoned for this.
True that.. I am going to ride a gold plated unicorn across a field of cocaine and coach purses when I graduate.
That was beautiful.
My addiction to golf is getting out of hand....I just caught myself swinging my dick like a putter while peeing.
I have a 16 minute video of you talking about your life. We are calling it your Anthology sponsored by Steel Reserve
spending my first valentines day single in 3 years blazed and eating heart shaped brownies i bought myself. WHO NEEDS A MAN.
Dude, if I don't end up wearing a banana suit in Milwaukee, I will consider that trip a complete failure.
so i might have figured out why that girl isn't talking to me...I'm 90% confident I didn't give her a pillow when she stayed over >.>
She swallowed the key to the cuffs, I've been having to explain the pink fuzz all morning.
Nothing much. Just taking shots of tequila before I go get a bikkini wax. You?
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