A big part of growing up is learning how to tastefully stare at women
It's 3am, i just got back from ht e bars and registered for classes larteeeeee. History of baseball at 8am? at least ill meet the only stragiht gusy at NYU!
Just found out I have to work new year's eve. It's like one final 'fuck you' from 2009.
Everyone is in jail. I'll see what i can do though
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Soo I have a handle of 100 proof captain, cupcakes, and nothing to get up for in the morning.. This blizzard is shaping up to be a great night.
God Help those hot young girls. It's going to be like Bambi in iraq. Except worse.
So, do you think I should wash the ashes off of my forehead before going to the strip club?
Someone jacked my earrings off me or I threw em in the toilet again
I hate when that happens
Finals week...the biggest cock block since your brother threatened me with a beer bottle at the bar.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He wouldn't let me put a red handprint on his face or scream to him everytime he walked away.
Why did you want to do any of that?
If someones last name is Wilson, you are obligated to pretend that you are Tom Hanks and they are a Volleyball and quote the movie when you speak to them.
That hot guy just got to class and he's eating a bagel sandwich. I dunno which I'm more attracted to
i have too much dick at my disposal? i should make them fight. best dick pic gets laid
Is it weird that the girl I'm fucking just wished me luck on my date tonight?
Interesting fact: if you wanted to rename a guy Jeff, just tell him you only fuck Jeffs. Magically whatever name he was using is actually his middle name cause he doesn't like going by Jeff.
are you comparing glasses to pregnancy
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