Friday was tragic. I was naked on top of him and he didn't have a condom. Oh and he had an Obama poster on the wall in front of his bed so our president was staring down at me while I was naked. I felt sorta bad.
You should've just screamed yes we can!
She was like the Rudy of blow jobs... SO much effort into it
It's barely 9 am & I've already had an ice cube IN my vagina
Thats why you have fulfilling relationships with nice girls and i have kinky sex with crazies
I'll pull you in a wagon. You'll have a sash and a crown on and we'll sing "All the Single Ladies"
You were so drunk last night you thought you force pushed the automatic door open.
We woke up in the room with a hamburger patty on the bed side table, one bun across the room, and the other bun under my pillow. Still don't know who ordered room service.
A reason for us to be drunk all week National Singles Week
Do I have to formally apologize to Brett for flashing him?
first time i ever mailed panties back to a fuck buddy. what better of a way to say its over
There aren't enough words in the English language to fully describe how worried I am for your dick. And the rest of you, I suppose.
You're a mystery wrapped in an enigma wrapped in a redhead
The guy at the liqiour store just said "Wow haven't seen you in awhile, is everything okay?"
he broke off the kiss to ask "can I grab your boob?" like props for asking for clear and concise consent but there HAS to be a sexier way to do it
she bought my drinks all night, made me breakfast in the morning, and let me use her expensive hair products before i left. best one night stand ever.
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