yo I sort of want to fuck rachel maddow. but I'm not a lesbian. actually I reaally want to so maybe I am a lesbian. at least on weekdays at 9.
Marriage: a sacred union between one man and one woman, and another woman in Argentina.
We're doing a case race on Saturday.
I'm in. I'm currently drinking a beer in the bathtub so I guess I can consider this "practice" and not just "alcoholism"
She just tagged pictures of you wrapped in the "above the influence banner" like a toga.
I have to think about this realistically and not with my vagina.
If anyone ask I'm rushing for brotherhood, not so that this bartender will suck my dick
It's ok, I like adventure. Just ask my vagina.
Getting my nails done with Diana... I'm going for the keep your friends close and the girl who's dating the guy you want to fuck closer
So the TSA can feel me inside and out in front of 40 people, but they catch me fucking in the bathroom 20 feet away and all of a sudden their the decency police
My mom just told me not to dance on any tables on Halloween...I'm choosing to take that statement as a joke
It's okay, big boobs are better than running.
Hungover on St. Patrick's Day. I did this backwards.
I'm in the liquor store and fucking "Wannabe" by the Spice Girls is playing. IM ALREADY ASHAMED OF MY REASON FOR BEING HERE, GIVE ME A BREAK.
I think I'll shower sitting down. That seems safe.
If I had your ass I would rule the world
Randomize
