Done. Eyebrows are waxed, entire body shaved
She said she didn't have time to shave "there"
Then she shouldn't have had time to order the lobster.
I'm passing your future prison.
Why do you apologize after every time we have sex?
and then you went into taco bell without pants...and surprisingly you weren't the only one there without pants
Want to get together for a boner voyage before you leave?
There is a hatefuck that has the destruction level of an atom bomb raging through my viens just aching to vaporize her.
I'm going to pound you from behind over a table at the bar while I pull your hair and call you a whore...please pass along that message to Rob
Ok ladies its the usual spring break system. 5 for a guy, 10 for a non-lesbian girl and double points is its a group thing. Hottest guy of the day is an additional 15. GAME ON
She offered to treat me to breakfast after a one night stand if I meet her parents and sex again if I act as her bf. It may be a trap but its a offer I won't refuse.
My CPA just snapchatted me a picture of her playing beer pong at a picnic. Time to do my own taxes?
Turns out the dorm toilet can't take a punch. Gonna be a long year without Mexican food.
We can get drunk and battle coyotes
you're hired as official boob wrangler
If he doesn't fuck you on the 4th of July, he doesn't really love this country.
Randomize
