Should I go home with him even though I know my Run DMC undies have skid marks on them?
billy ray cyrus is narrating a show on the history channel. my iq cant decide whether to go up or down.
I don't care how bad it tastes, i just put it in my mouth and deal with it
it's business casual sex. like no kissing, shake hands after, occasional frequency
I need to stop fucking people before I get to know them
I Never golf you the sypdu of andrew. The one o will marry. The one j plwgded my last breath up. The one I pledged everything I live forbworh to. I love him more than life itself
I have your dog in a headlock. Se wants my mushrooms.
It's ok for me to have his baby but I can't be his friend on fb. Wth is wrong with this
is it possible i asked you to give me a preliminary pap smear?
Also, my drunkenly packed sleepover kit consisted of a singular sock, my uncharged laptop, and a pack of post-it notes.
Seriously, webMD this shit for me, I cant move and I dont wanna die until I have something worth fighting over in my will
Only in my life does a conversation about Hanukkah lead to sexting
Just threw up in the MSO airport men's room. We're at that point this morning.
I don't get promposals. When I asked my date I was so drunk I couldn't lift my head. Then I puked on my lawn after he said "ok whatever". That's romance
he said "i'm the cat whisperer, watch". he took a hit from the pipe, grabbed the cat and blew the smoke in its ear. he grinned and the cat started purring. it was magnificent
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