Hey, go out with us like you promised. You're younger than us and should be able to handle your coke problem with grace.
is it true you fucked a yoga instructor last night??! ..and let me know if you want me to post that question on your facebook so kelly can see how happy you are without her
whats wrong with me. i have a coffee mug of wine in the library and i'm doing homework
I'm high, and her 2,100 tagged pictures annoy me even MORE. I wish it had a google searchbar so I could type in "cleavage pics" to get to the point.
Sometimes he has weird facial hair...Basically he has a penis... that's what he's got going for him.
If you could come over after class and poke me with a stick to see if im still alive id really appreciate it
I can feel my ovaries exploding thinking about them.
I don't know if I want to live in a world where i can't fuck an exes brother.
It's been this way for a few days. I had chick fil a on Friday so this could be an attack from the Gay Gods as punishment.
I may have played more drinking games with my family this last week than all of freshman year...
I just messaged a senior at Harvard and told him to 'tinder me softly'
Made out with a mannequin all morning in cpr training, so im ready to party
Why is my vagina being sacrificed for yours? I'm sure he would take a piece of you too. Your turn.
Take your time. I'm mowing the lawn. In the dark. Drunk.
Just hooked up my fuck buddy with a job working for my dad...this can only end bad.
Randomize
