I'm fascinated by her cleavage. She has deep cleavage, but no obvious boobage to speak of. Check it out.
is it trashy that while he was throwing up in the bathroom, i was hooking up with his childhood best friend?
It's safe to say that our attempt at trying to fuck in the grand Sierra elevator was a bad idea.
I may be a little fuzzy on this, but I think at some point I said something about being a generous lover.
the guy sitting next to me at the bar has a patrick swayze tattoo hovering over a roast beef sandwich. 'merica.
No memories of receiving this. Or of getting home. Or of apparently developing a taste for marmalade, which I assume is yours because I have literally never eaten it before. It's all over the kitchen. And my phone. And in my hair. Oh god I wish I wasn't on the train to work. X And sorry about the kitchen x
I woke up hugging a box of cheerios that had "wonder woman" written in sharpie on it. So much for a sober night.
Next time I try to break into the police station drunk, please stop me.
I just did a walk of shame on my own block. one of the old neighbors saw and greeted me "good morning, girl next door"
I couldn't find any flowers so I brought her a cat.
There is a time and place for BDSM, in-between disney sing-alongs is not one of them.
He asked me while we were fishing why the passion was gone when we have sex. It's official...I am the dude in this relationship.
dude where did you go last night?
when the tequila says to run, you start running.
Someone signed my nipple.
I'm drunk and don't know where I am. There's a giant metal penguin if that helps.
Randomize
