I'm sitting at the gyno watching cnn in the waiting room
Everyone is walking funny when they come out, ugh I'm not looking forward to this
It's like his dick is pushing through his pants and driving him over here.
Well, as a member of the greater american southwest gay community I just have to mark this as a total loss and you will be missed.
I'm on my way, but at some point we're going to have to settle who gave who crabs the last time
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like I wont be making enough money to support my frivilous lifestyle of beer and mcdonalds
I'm lost. Please come find me. I'm inside the I-270 circle somewhere. I can hear laughing.
I would not be 19 again if you paid me. Guess who found naked pictures of themselves? Fuck cocaine
You don't understand, we were on a waffle house. Both of us were absolutely certain we passed out at his place then BAM! Waffle house.
We are going to need a water proof camera with a flash....exit routes....lots of booze.....and a tutu for good measure
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm sitting in my 10 am lecture drinking a flask out of a dorritos bag...I think people are starting to notice but I'm already too drunk to care
Walk of shame: Easter Edition. He is risen.
I can't give advice right now, I have a yeast infection.
He wants to buy me a wedding ring and pretend to be married to someone else when we fuck. It actually makes me wet thinking about it.
avocado toast wont fix the fact you did a bunch of blow you fucking hipster
ok, muffins say "love me", waffles say "fuck me", got it.
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