end the night at a gay bar...not sure how...but why the fuck do i have two condoms in my pocket?
Tell me exactly where it said it wasn't a unisex bathroom.
they need to just BURY HIM!
the guy in front of me just bought a pound of bacon, a bouquet, and a case of budlight, i want to see THAT makeup sex
Deadliest Catch is NOT foreplay
He kept singing "who's that peekin in my window" we thought he was high til we realized someone was lookin in the windows.
I full on slapped a girl with pizza. Like in the face with sauce splattered everywhere and grease with a hard slap to the face.
Ohh man do you know how awkward it is to keep eye contact and have a normal conversation with someone while their hand is in your vagina?
High school girls are buying me shots. This will not end well.
Strip club for my birthday. And none of this discrimination shit. We're going to a guys one and girls one. Go get your singles.
I can't imagine anything that has a removal ass flap as being sexy
if you arent using your penis to save lives, then what good is it?
Listen, some people have dreams, some people just want to cock slap a kangaroo
I'm sorry I crashed your motorcycle and watched you get robbed from a rooftop. Will you please come back or at least drop off my shoes?
We got to the hospital and the girls who caused the accident had already added you on facebook.
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