Yo I'm just eating dinner now. U ready to go out?
Ya ya. Where you eating?
Cereal and beer. U kno u want in.
I am pretty sure he just licked my hand while trying to sing goo goo dolls iris to me. Get me out of this state.
I just googled dawgpound, shoulda seen that pornsite coming
you wrote "5 million dollars" in the tip line for the pizza delivery man and insisted that he deserves it
Idk how she did it. Either she watches freakier porn than I do, or I really need to go get tested.
I walked in and she was doing shots, betting the managers if any of the customers would notice, and screaming that nothing would ruin her Saturday night. Say what you want, I like working with my sister.
That's because you're a slut. A slut fucking a fence.
Sending me a thank you card for letting you fuck my sister was completely inappropriate
Post-sex chicken soup was such a good idea. It's been like an hour and I'm still applauding myself
Seius question. Does a penis floar when ina baht? Must find out.
He just told me what he wants for his birthday. "a noise complaint" he also said he wants to be the cause of all the noise but he won't be the one making the noise.
We can't BOTH have terrible sex lives. Get fucked or throw him out.
Most people would probably take his lack of responses as a queue to stop. But nope, not me. I just keep going. And that's why I don't have a bf, just a little weinered friend
He's sending me pics of Yellowstone scenery...the only thing I can think is "I would have sex next to that waterfall"
We could get her a gift basket of Xanax l
Randomize
