I don't know how much more of summer my liver can take.
I woke up from my nap, looked out my window, and saw about bout 6 people get tasered in less than 20 seconds.....could someone please tell me what's going on.
They sat at the bar while we waited for a table. When the hostess came to seat us, they were shitfaced, and swordfighting wth chop sticks.
My day may involve a drug pinata. I LOVE MY LIFE.
We're listening to space jam. This can only be a good omen.
She cried the whole movie and got kicked out for saying "[Santa's beard] looks so soft I wanna stick my dick in it." We're going again next week. Drunk animation majors are the best
That hot guy i showed you guessed my exact bra size. I want to have his tan babies.
What part of drinking with my mom makes you think i'd get naked
All of it
its one thing to be single and another thing to be single and then have your profile picture be of you and the cat
your picture is with misty too!!
I AM SINGLE BY CHOICE
girl pulled up to the stop sign, got out, threw up all over my hood said happy thanksgiving then drove off
Please note that in response to your post about your dog's jaws clamped hard around a stick, I did not comment, "Takes after his dad." You're welcome.
He propositioned me for a threesome once so yeah I'd say he has what it takes to run for public office
So I have now fucked both my roommates...This is why I can’t live with men.
She told me I’m a “stunt cock.” I’m okay with that
It's next to that place that has cock fighting.
Randomize
