What do you do when the person in the stall next to you says they're jealous?
i need a wealthy benefactor or a cocktail job. or to start stripping. or kill myself. whatever.
Yeah, you spent an hour in front of the mirror trying to reenact the Sailor Moon theme song.
If that really is brett favre's penis, no wonder she ignored his calls
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
definitely fulfilled the lesbian status quo and fucked her in the back seat of my prius
I'm sitting in the corner at the bar with a poolstick in case a brawl breaks out. Some crazy shit is going down and I'm trying to show my feathers like a horny peacock.
I'm blaming hurricane Irene if I get pregnant tonight.
You thought your socks were broken. They were just inside out.
I was thinking about getting her an edible arrangement for an engagement gift. You want in?
I'm buying her a drink and not telling her to dump his ass. that's my gift.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he used the hotel microwave to cook the 16" pizza he bought at the walmart deli
He used a "food city great value" card to cut it
Mistakes were made. Hot mistakes that I want to make again. But tapping your employee is def a mistake. Esp in front of two other employees.
Have you had sex with a man from New Zealand? No? Then your input is invalid.
How many nights in 2015 can we have no one get injured, run away crying, or get into a brawl?
you yelled, puked and cried then passed out in the fetal position in your underwear
Why did I wake up with a skeleton in my bed? Is it from the lab?
Oh crap, that's where it ended up. Yeah, don't ask.
Randomize