Mario Lopez is the poor mans Ryan Seacrest
So I went to have a snack...can you please tell me why there's a condom in the hummus?
she just took a shower. i'll probs go down on her to encourage shower taking. it's like pavlov, you know?
Everything is bigger in Texas. Including Colt's vagina.
There are two people having sex in one of the showers right now trying to silence their orgasm sounds and failing. Thank you coed bathrooms.
herpes texted me again. he says he wants my vagina.
ok we should really consider changing this guys nickname...
I don't think you have the libido for two women at the same time
I think you underestimate the amount of time spent masturbating
We made a drinking game out of Project Runway. Gay guys are so fun.
She's an ex-convict. She actually got stabbed in the face with a pen while in prison. No big deal.
I just walked past a woman in the bar stroking a mans crotch, yelling 'I made this. I made this happen.'
Last time I sleep with a guy with a penchant to fragrance his dick. Every time I sit to pee, I get a whiff of Axe body spray.
Wow I didn't even consider the possibility of him having ED. I'm gaining so many life experiences from dating an older man
We were licking ciroc off the poker table
He sent me a slow motion video of him jerking off...it was so long (the video not his dick) even I felt awkward watching it alone
You like that 95% of the time I masterbate I think bout you?
Just wanna know what I can I do to earn the other 5%
Randomize
