did you ever find your cell phone? and your dignity?
Now I know how you felt every time you had to listen to me have sex with a girl... mildly disguested yet marginally proud.
i feel like arbor mist is too classy for that. you need a colt 45
Yeah you're right. The one time when arbor mist is too classy
i'm not the one sitting naked in my room playing with my boobs and a cat.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So last week was the 4th time a girl cried after sex. I'm seriously doing something wrong
raced the clock twice to day to see if i could get off before my computer died and before i left for my noon bar crawl... win, win
lets go back to having secrets in our friendship
Someone drunkenly cleaned and organized my car last night... Nothing's missing, so that's a plus.
it's always good to have a friend that's a hairdresser, a massage therapist, maybe throw in a lawyer just in case, and always have a friend on food stamps
According to my snapchat story, I tore a fake wig off a security guard and ran away with it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's 7:30pm and we've already lost someone and had to run from the cops. What the fuck did you put in the punch?
We talked about breaking up, had sex, and in the middle of said sex, talked more about breaking up- best sad day ever
NOT PREGNANT HIGH FIVE!
No way man ... This is real life. Complete sentences and everything.
Woke up with a girls naked next to me I had her thong on somehow.
Straight boys are literally imbeciles. If Darwinism doesn’t get them female rage will.
Randomize