just saw a guy throwing up in the urinal at Dennys. Either he had one hell of last night or we are going to eat somewhere else
his name is not nearly as fun as i thought to yell out in bed
Somebody spraypainted a transformers head on a transformer box..my life is complete
He;s fine. He just kept saying "hurricane Gordon is coming to shore" and flexed his muscles a lot.
Counseling BFF to break up with her BF. We will get that 3-way
I thought stuff was gonna go really bad after he filled the super-soaker with kerosene. but it all turned out pretty well.
merry christmas to all and to all I give the mystery rash.
I peed on his girlfriend's loofah during our post-sex shower.
Lesson of the night: never take shots out of a bottle you found under a couch in a frat house. I have no idea where I am
Had the longest conversation today with a potentially homeless cuban woman about mind control.
Is there a special protocol when the stripper has a Boba Fett tattoo?
The walk of shame is a lot easier when I'm at a music festival and it's 12 feet from his tent to my tent
You are living the dream.
Just put on slippers before underwear so you know where my priorities are
If you ever "miss" working, I'm going to fist you with my hulk hands. BOTH of them.
Shit facedness and cuddling are what you have to look forward to this evening.
Randomize
