so i slept on a park bench last night...no hobo
It was all about her orgasm last night. I felt like a human dildo.
passed a homeless guy with a sign that read "420 vetran" we gave him a bowl of bud
I HAVE A PIGEON IN MY JACKET.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Neil John just started open mouth kissing everyone to make sure they are safe.
Currently cooking 3lbs of bacon in case the power goes out bc if even one slice of bacon goes to waste then sandy wins
there is a video of me on Facebook getting mad at a trash bin what the fuck was in your Pepsi
That sad moment when even your drug dealer lands a summer internship and you don't...
Just got our of the shower. I'm standing naked in front of my open windows cause fuck my neighbors that's why
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Stalker pic that shit
He left, I think he got uncomfortable when I started singing 'oompah oompah doodley do, I have a special riddle for you'
THE SUPER HOT BARTENDER WHO LOOKS LIKE RYAN GOSLING JUST WALKED IN. BUT HE DOESNT EVEN WALK HE GLIDES. LIKE AN ANGEL.
Only thing exciting about him was his dick.
If God is analyzing my life right now extremely proud or dissapointed but either way I took wednesday night drinkin to new levels
Anal on new furniture sounds like a quickest way to violate a warranty
I'm too depressed to drink my wine. That is what I would call a serious problem
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