wow, so sex, not that great its like masturbating with a warm towelette, like the kind you get at a japanese restaurant
I have the Lakers game on, but all I can think about is having sex with you. Not sure what you've done here.
i gave you head in a backbend. if that doesnt say happy birthday i dont know what does.
Ikeep having to ask jim if I'm actually talking. I canmt feel my body...this is what Christmas is all about
I don't know if it has occurred to you yet, but you are dating a nymphomaniac, and your work schedule is an interference of my needs being fulfilled. Get home now.
I managed to make myself a bowl of apple jacks, took one bite and had to stop eating them because they were making my brain wiggle. How was your comedown?
I'm sorry. I just realized our 'big night out' ended up being you driving my high ass to get burritos and back.
Oh yea... In other news I've decided to get an external hard drive and start getting music from all the guys I'm fucking... Do you think a terabyte would be enough storage space?
You got me so high that I almost couldn't leave my house for a bar because there was nothing to lean against on the way there
Send me one of your boob pics as an example. I mean this in the straightest least lesbian way possible.
I probably should have eaten more before I started shotgunning beers at 9am, but it was so much damn fun.
I have vodka and 50 pizza rolls best spring break ever
If we were teenagers we would intentionally be trying to burn down this historic landmark
I just puked into a clean basket of laundry.
it was like 6 shots in and he was automatically my type
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