I'm not crazy, I only keep calling you cause you won't pick up.
All I seem to do lately is get myself off, take naked pictures and drink beer. I don't know if thats a good or bad thing.
The walk of shame is slightly more complicated when you wake up in the wrong country...
please stop telling ppl youre Alice Cullen when youre drunk
He showed up 3 hours late wearing roller skates and acted like nothing was wrong with that.
I wish pancakes were everywhere. Just pancakes. I want lilies at my wedding. No dress. Just priest. Just lilies.
I let a naked juice spill down my leg for like 30 minutes bc i thought i was hallucinating that my leg was cold.
In honor of the internet blackout, I think everyone needs to change their Facebook pictures to ones of them being blacked out.
Clearly my hormones are sending beaming lights to every penis in the area
Booty calls should never involve the cops.
I just want to dump glitter on my floor and roll in it like a cat in catnip.
Had the best sex Thursday night then Friday night I met his girlfriend. The worst thing is we became friends like she gave me her number.
He was stoned laying on my bed singing I'm a little tea cup while I took a pregnancy test. Thank god it was negative.
I frew up on some kids lovely sidealk chald drawings..
He was referring to me as "Teenage Dream" the whole night
Randomize
