I'm sorry I'm just not ready to become vampire yet
You thought that the "chillable" logo on the box wine was referring to a city in italy.
...so how do you feel about living with a lesbian next year?
hhaha i just laughed out loud when i read that
is that a "i laughed because im fine with it" or "im a republican" ?
I got lit on fire and andy went to jail last night. Totally unrelated incidents though.
The good thing about having holes in your nose from all the drugs you do is that you can't smell nasty things. Like puke.
some people spend their whole lives trying to find their soulmate. who knew mine was hiding in utah successfully balancing a pageant career and a coke habit.
Just watched my roommate stuff a sandwich in his pocket because we're out of paper plates.
Dude. The amount of love and appreciation from a house full of stoners when you come home at 4 am with donuts is overwhelming. The kind of love to make Jesus have to work a little harder at his unconditional love thing.
i woke up this morning put my hand under the pillow and there was a banana there
Let's just say it was like a porno version of Aladdin....
it’s not easy to sexualize brunch. work with me, babe.
I also don't hate being called a giant sack of cheese. Is that weird?
Every text my dad sends me is an AA mantra. Might be time to take a look at my life.
I was just dry heaving outside of the Chem building when a guided tour walked by. Welcome to the Maritimes kids...
is it still considered wake n bake if you wake up at 2 pm?
Randomize
