Update. It gets worse. A) he's done viagra and B) he wears socks at all times.
I asked my mother if she peed on that chair, she said "not bad" There is no good level of pee on a chair.
shouldve known this week was gonna be bad when I threw up in my coffee mug
She just ended a sentence with "and he doesn't even mind my herpes..."
Idk how hard you fucked her, but you managed to leave permanent ass prints on my tempurpedic mattress.
at least you know where his tattoos end, so it wasn't a complete waste of time.
Instead of a hangover my body just feels like shame
That is a hangover
I would prefer a headache
My fuck buddy is great and all, but it gets weird when she gets in arguments with her BF in the driveway
He says he invented a new sex move called The Redbird that we can only do when I'm on my period. Should I be concerned?
I was just hotboxing under my sheets and I got lost on the way out.
It was so scary.
Can i have the words "she went crazy and never came back" written on my grave?
I was thrusting to the beat of Felix Navidad..
Life should not be this hard with a dick this big.
Do you think it would be weird to add her on Facebook?
You just commited a felony act together, I honestly think we're beyond this.
You faceplanted on the railroad tracks and when I tried to tell you to get up, you told me you were "taking a quick breather"
Randomize
