I would fuck her until my dick fell off. then i would fuck her with your dick.
i finally understand why guys leave in the middle of the night.......they got it right
stuffed animals make me feel really maternal.
Sometimes when i'm at a cross roads in life, i think about what i would want my lifetime movie to show what i did
We all have a cross to bear. Yours just happens to be attracting gay men.
apparently drunk me likes to play hide the puke.. was not a fun time washing all my legos.
Caught my drug dealer jacking off. I think this is a new step in our relationship
Then you started screaming that this was the first time you did e and that you had a 4.8 gpa, that was right before you almost suffocated between that one girl's tits.
I just pulled a piece of cookie out of my bra in the middle of class. I'm forever alone.
If is anything like my past relationships, I have no doubt that I will single-handedly reignite the Cold War
If it wasn't for the fact that I drink during my lunch break I'm pretty sure I would have quit this job by now
Also I feel like death. But like. In a good way
I didn't really understand how big 10 inches is. Now I know.
woke up with 4 bruises, 2 hickies and a bad case of rug burn. texans are dangerous.
Stop saving videos when you’re using my pornhub account!!! My girlfriend just tried to finger my butt because she thinks I’m into that
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