Courtney? Is that you? I have pictures of this very same night.
Amandyke just told me shes gonna make my tongue her cum rag. i'm borderline terrified
She took her shirt off and was broader than Dwight Howard.
just looked at his mug shot... not really my type
We lived together for a year and neither of us knew we were both gay.
Travelers Top-Tip: Europeans do not appreciate being repeatedly referred to as "gypsy" regardless of how good your Borat impression is.
I have so much shit FLYING through my head. They're all in magic carpets and everything
High enough to ask the woman at best buy if she ever feels like she's swimming. and telling the man outside that he smells like happy juice.
History professor is at the bar. Hurry! There's only so many A's he could give before it starts to look bad.
My last google search is "how to build a flamethrower"
i'm face down in a ditch right now please help this is not a metaphor for my life this is real.
He's the only guy without a tacky accent I've seen in this southern dump in 6 months. Bangage was inevitable.
You're such a Yankee.
You said you brought chipotle into a movie and I asked you to marry me and you said yes
I still don't know why she was so offended when I emerged from the bathroom and told her my balls were now clean.
Holy. Shit. I just remembered all the lapdances....
Randomize
