So...we accidentally left a bag of puke in your sister's room. Heads up.
how is it that boston is so bitchin and the rest of massachusetts sucks so much?
how is it that you still think "bitchin" is an acceptable term anymore?
Yeah..And after he fingered me, he wiped it on my face and laughed.
ew wtf
just fell over trying to sit on the toliet like a robot.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I figured it out. hungover me hates drunk me, drunk me hates sober me, and sober me hates being sober. so yes, were blacking out tonight.
she tried to handfeed me fritos while yelling "PENIS TRAIN"
Smoked a blunt with a girl i met at the bus stop today. What you did today is irrelevant
Trying to roll joints on a seadoo in the middle of a lake on a windy night. -Juststonerthings
Apparently I'm a "fire hazard"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
quick, give me some iron man trivia, i'm going to make this girl regret quoting tony stark in her tinder bio
Friends don't let friends go vibrator shopping alone.
CUM CAME OUT OF MY NOSE. MY SINUSES ARE ENTIRELY FUCKED UP NOW BC OF THE CUM TRAVELING IN PLACES IT SHOULD NOT HAVE.
He wants me to fart in his mouth and is offering me SOOOO much coke. I'm stuck between a rock and a hard place. GIVE ME ADVICE.
So I think my neighbor's name is Olli if I'm hearing the girl the girl he's fucking clearly
they told me that it was glow in the dark and would make me magical. I was too drunk to say no. I woke up to a purple vagina.
its like a neon Im stupid as fuck sign
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