No, veal is cruel because they chain them down, I'm talking about free range human babys here.
Okay call me later ill be watching lifetime and scrubbing throw up off my feet
so when we got to the frat house he had a travel sized toothpaste and toothbrush for me and gave me a pair of his shorts and a girl's sorority t shirt...something tells me he's done this before
Just found out my brother beats off to Lauren Conrad. the Hills will never be the same.
he walked out as i was licking snow off of his car...
Uh, do you remember who's thong is in my tree?
How dare you. Idk what you called me, and neither does google translate, but you better take it back.
It was his first time doing shrooms and we made him ride in the truck bed. But he kept standing up and yelling when we stopped so we had to keep driving
Will that be creepy to wake him up at midnight with my tongue all over his body??
But I swear to god if I'm awkwardly there while you try to have sex with someone again I'm getting high with your dad
He crawled outside into the bushes to throw up. He's just laying there now but he says he'll be ready to come home if we just give him five
Steaks?
It's Ash Wednesday.
If you really think that not eating meat on a weeknight is going to keep you out of hell, fine. Can I use that chimichurri you made?
Its my nipple ring piercing anniversary. We need to celebrate.
literally who communicates this much post-hookup why r u like this
Just let me pee on you and I'll leave you alone.
Randomize
