I wish I could be a nicer person. Or a more sober one.
Dude, I would hit that so hard that whoever could pull me out would become the king of England
we were spooning and you were the big spoon but you insisted that I call you "the ladle"
You just kept screaming "You are no House!!!" at the ER doc trying to stitch your head
If a young child walked up to you and grabbed your penis, you'd feel violated too.
Through drunken recall, I have managed to bring back awful memories of losing my virginity. And possibly traumatized my niece trying to get her to "learn from my mistakes".
It finally happened. My conscience stopped working. I've never felt so free
Im drunk with people I love less than you. fix it.
Well, it was good.. One step forward for my vaj.. One giant leap backwards for my integrity.
So to distract myself from jackies vomiting, im making up a story in my head. It's called the little penis that could
Im going in through the window and borrowing her dog. Dont worry ive done this before. we have an agreement.
Might as well permanently tattoo lush somewhere on my body and show it to people when I decide to drink so they won't serve me.
I thought the first time I got peed on it would be by a baby...
I either have a problem or a really good solution... I just ordered my homecoming dress off of a website that sells forplay outfits.
It's not just going to appear. A lot of blood, sweat, tears, and leg work went into finding a cock that amazing!
Randomize
