What can i say, inner beauty is great but it makes a hard picture to jack off to
I'm not sure where but someone shit somewhere in the house
It's like I paid NJ Transit $33 to suck his dick and go home. Fuck that.
We need to buy some popsicles so we can remind ourselves we're good at this.
A Bum and I jusst hugged. its not even 8 pm.
She ditched her BF in the library to come see me wasted at a house party and i still ended up banging that rugby chick instead.
Someone had written "Boxmonsterette" on the bathroom wall and I just knew you'd been here.
I just literally had a dance party in my closet. I've never been this blazed.
We knew we were dealing with a pro when some random guy at the bar thew you over his shoulder and you still didn't spill your drink
Strangely enough, that's not the first time that's happened
haha all our friends are at the carnival and I'm on stage dry humping a 40 year old
when we woke up this morning she was missing two teeth. the front two.
I just used a box o wine to refill a bottle o wine to more effectively drunk clean
Let's be honest, I've seen a decent amount of dicks in my life and very few of them have been worth all the trouble.
That is priceless. You walk into her house, fuck her husband and demand Chinese food. Your an inspiration to us all.
Just made a secret hand shake with my sisters cat. Boredom at its finest.
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