Don't worry about later. I already pre-ordered a pizza for a 1:45 delivery and told them to ignore any calls from your number.
You're getting good at this, you know that?
ok, I understand that your bathroom door is broken, but at least close the blinds next time you take a shit. The entire parking garage just watched you.
Annd you probably wouldn't of fallen down the stairs if you didn't insist on taking 'finale shots'
I'm considering failing out of my last semester of college just so I can keep fucking him.
omg he is no good in bed, bless his little heart and his big dick
T minus 20 hours until we forget our names, find some city cowboys, and g&t into the night.
I think I ingested my vampire fangs last night.
That's a lot of people she's fucked in one picture.
I'm gonna snort this pill I found on the ground cause that's how classy I am. Watch football and eat Beef jerky. Domesticated at its finest.
But, if I start dating you brother, I can't talk to you about the sex anymore!! Like... Can we talk about it anonymously?! I just won't use his name.
The orgasm I got from him made me feel almost as good as I imagine the girls in the tampon commercials feel.
At one point my little brother was Rocky Balboa'd by a stripper's tit
my morning attempts to try to have sex with him was interrupted by the passion of the christ parade going on outside my house
He's smoked my weed, stolen my cigarettes, and used my campus cash, but I try to initiate sex and NOWWW he's all "As your RA, that's a line I can't cross"
I need to leave my mind and my stupid vagina are having fight over who's right
Randomize
