Dude, I don't think I'll ever be able to find a girl for me...
Is this the gay conversation?
My mom just told me that after i turned eight i stopped growing mentally and emotionally
Last night you told her she was rocking the beer gut. Still wondering why you have that black eye?
Somewhere out there, someone is getting laid. And then theres me, watching Star Trek porn while my roommate plays World of Warcraft next door
he broke up with her mid blow job, and somehow convinced her to finish. I want his life
So I realized I was officially over him when I was getting a lap dance on the keg bus at 3am from his old boss and I was double fisting:)
CHEMICAL ENGINEER. God my mom would be so proud of me.
Nope. Too hot. We just sat in my tub with cold water spraying on us drinking coronas. This summer heat is killing my libido slowly
Cut a hole in the crotch of my onesie so we could have sex without me getting cold. Best decision of my life.
We discussed how many times we've passed out during sex. The answers may shock you.
Mike's my new hero. There's a flagpole of hook-up's bras on his porch and a week's supply of beer in his fridge but he still has a great job.
I apparently asked the cab driver to show us his dick and then he showed me a picture of his girlfriend
Get ready tonight we are going to get drunk and pierce my nipples
You ever just SEE a guy and know he's good at choking someone out?
It's 3 am.
I refuse to fake an orgasm. If I'm dating him, he better work for that shit.
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