Ninja stars and alcohol are a bad combo
what is it about summer that misdirects my moral compass so much?
its like think what a normal person would think but completely the opposite.
Unintentionally made him cum in his own mouth, and he just sat there screaming..
he told me not to treat him like a child and then started peeing off the trampoline
holy fuck that shirt looks so good on him, it was like he was born with it on. that shirt deserves a blow
I was more than drunk as hell I have rug burn on my elbows from ninja roles on the ground..
Two options. One, you listen while I freak out. Two, we have mediocre to awesome car sex and don't talk. Either way, I'll be there by 7
I just gate-crahed a party and met a state senator, so I had an interesting afternoon jog.
I've started brushing my teeth at 6pm, because honestly alcohol is the only thing I consume after that
She asked me to dress as captain planet for halloween and told me she was gonna suck the pollution out of my dick.
Also, we can't be seen together looking suspicious or sexually satisfied
i had to call him over, it was my last chance at getting some tonight
HE HAS A RESTRAINING ORDER AGAINST U!!!
it expires tomorrow
i think we sleep fucked last night...
I hate when I'm sexting and I make a typo.
You just killed the sext mood.
Randomize
