The drink u got me is pineapple something w. Cigarete ashes in it.ima drink it anyway
It's one of the reasons i'm here, along with emotional support, physical support if you need it, and power orgasms.
Some random slut told me I was a good dancer then gave me a handjob. I felt like fucking John Travolta.
he told me he expects me to keep the fangs on when i go down on him. presumptuous, yes, but man after my own heart.
They let me out of the holding cell just in time for me to get the morning-after-pill. Rock bottom feels even worse with all those hormones.
I have bruises covered in glitter and someone just asked me if I realized I'm bleeding from both ears. This is awkward.
I dont know, but the way you were flopping around and gurgling made me scared that you were actually drowning in the carpet.
He asked me to spit in his mouth. I did. Never let me hook up with this guy again.
I would seriously fuck her so hard, her contacts would pop out of her eyes.
You threw a shot glass at the bartender and still managed to convince him to let us drink more. You are my hero.
it's ok my mom asked me why i had a guys shirt on and also why there was chocolate all over my bra
I think the only context in which I'd be comfortable being kidnapped is by a band of baby sloths
Dude. He almost took three different girls home, all while dressed up as Amy Winehouse. If he goes as Kurt Cobain next weekend, we're screwed.
Personally, I'm gonna be Sexy Dobby the House Elf.
If you can give me an orgasm, you'll get a trophy.
Randomize
