the thought of Anne Coulter teabagging Dick Cheney kills me everytime.
so all night Ive been that girl with her tits out @ the bar. I mean I dropped jaws, yo. But in a classy way.
ed mcmahon, farrah fawcett, and michael jackson all in one week. What next god, are you juts gonna take my penis too?
I think we should make Neil Patrick Harris a permanent part of our role playing.
she was like the girl next door.. if you lived next door to a whorehouse
there was so much ham clogging the tub drain.. he said it was ok he has a cleaning lady
lit a joint with my parents wedding matches today, this is what happens when you're out of lighter fluid. didnt even feel guilty.
I have never heard someone not give a fuck so poetically in my life. I feel like you should be leading men into battle with a speech like that
I don't even care that his girlfriend will be there. Us hooking up is a tradition and she will NOT ruin it.
I'm supposed to be maturing, but no instead I'll be shitting my pants in Delaware for my 30th.
Hahahaha nah you won't shit your pants - but you will fully try mushrooms.
Opened the apartment door and the smell of sex and weed literally slapped me across the face. Kudos.
Like real life can suck my metaphorical dick right now.
Your life is quite full of dick lately.
It really is!
Like wanna sit on your face while you speak German hot
My father has a definite type: blonde, busty, 18-22. It was awkward when I was in college, but now I'm over it. I play wingman for him and he buys me expensive purses for the assistance in getting him hooked up with girls younger than me. Win-win.
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