Yeah but his hole really smells sometimes
Do you think most people who work at an airport Chili's can pin point where their lives went wrong?
She wants out first dance to be to 98 degrees i do cherish you...remember how i said we didn't need open bar....
He was sweet. He even warned me that his dick curved, and I quote, "more than a banana."
Just once id like to sleep with a man who i havent thrown up on
Absence makes the cock grow harder.
She called herself a train and then took off all her clothing. I forget everything after that.
I saw you two flinging Jello at the sidewalk if that helps jog your memory.
threw up in the library. i should be embarrassed, but i'm willing to bet that i'm one of the first so i'm kinda proud.
The fact that when I blacked in you were sober enough to kick me out of your roommates bed makes me question our friendship.
Also I'd like you to set a calendar reminder that goes off every day for you to take 2 minutes to think about what your life would be like without me.
I only call her for sex and medical advice. She admitted she feels like a worried parent when her phone rings at 5 a.m.
We're only going to be this young and this cute but for so long. And how often is it that a pack of Albanian law students is in your house?!
I need a fuck buddy with more available hours
What the fuck were you guys talking about?
Lube wrestling.
Oh, makes sense.
Just motorboated this 18 year old girl at the bar. The first time was my idea the other 3 she made me. Maybe turning 27 won't be so bad. Haha.
Randomize
