"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
there should be a national holiday dedicated to how high i am
Lindsay lohan: road to jail is on E tonight. Bring vodka we are not missing an opportunity to make a drinking game out of this
besides i was ending his dry spell. it's written in the bible that jesus likes that right?
No, fuck buddies don't get birthday party privledges...
Sorry.
Neil John just started open mouth kissing everyone to make sure they are safe.
Next time we include dessert condiments into our sex life we can fuck up my sheets. It's only fair.
After a few mimosas, my mom started sharing her plans to move out of the house and into a retirement village so she can be the youngest one there and find herself a "nice old sugar daddy." Needless to say, break has not started off well...
i spent my morning giving relationship advice to the kid i had sex with on a kitchen table this weekend
Pretty sure my idea of standards went out the window when I hooked up with a guy who had a rooster tattoo with an arrow pointing down to his no no bits. Think about it.
Dislocated my knee during sex, popped it back in and kept going. Then got simpathy chipotle out of it too.
Shaving your balls drunk sounds like a good idea untill you do it
I've lost every trace of self esteem. Even sneaking a BJ in the coffee room has lost it's luster.
In case you were wondering I realized something last night, Rick James was correct. Cocaine is a hell of a drug.
The only good thing about 2020 is that the hot flight attendant neighbors are using my pool a lot. If i can keep them from wandering into my Zoom meeting with my boss I’m golden
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