if my college career had corporate sponsors, they would be natty light and aim toothpaste.
he showed me his boner with his cell phone light during the movie.
you yelled "you will never make love to jesus" and then ran into the tv.
Well look at it this way, if he should happen to get into a terrible accident within the next 2 days, its okay.. i have his dental records on my ass cheek.
I am 100% positive that I have seen a porno that was shot in this bar.
You coming bye my yot got egg sweet carilne vodklaa
He's like the unplanned child of drunkenness
I think the paper my teacher just handed back to me had one of his pubes on it, I'm way too hungover for this
Sorry I peed on your ottoman
Oh no. Did we do a blood oath again?!
My neighbour just came round to ask why we posted a spatula through his door at 3am. What do I tell him??
I'm sorry my shit is everywhere... I accidentally got drunk while packing
No, Ethan, handcuffs and friendship bracelets are not "basically" the same thing.
And then she grabbed my dick and started singing 'ring ring ring ring banana phone'
The hangover struggle is to real, just passed the drive thru window. Twice.
Randomize
