While I was fucking her, they came in and served us both weed from a hookah. best. friends. ever.
I just accidentally stumbled into an AA meeting...I think its a sign
heading to class now, facing the weekend consquences
and apparently i was drunk enough to follow up with "I'd let me touch your boobs" ... not my best line.
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
i think the beer goggles wore off after hearing the story of her 2nd abortion
There is a contact in my phone named "Bar Mcntysu." this is why we need a third person to go out with us.
There's nothing worse than carrying your fairy crown and wings home wearing fishnets
Also I owe you 20 bucks, a clean towel and a glass of scotch. I'll even throw in a blow job
Have you ever been up at one in the morning and thought to yourself, "I do not know nearly enough about penguin reproduction"?
Sometimes in life you just have to realize the security deposit isn't worth it.
I HAVE DISCOVERED LONDON AND IT FILLS ME WITH JOY
Well I'm glad your Saturday night went a lot better than mine. I spent mine crying in a McDonald's parking lot.
why do i have a pole dance champion shot glass?
Sorry about kicking you last night but you don’t mess with a girls margarita bucket. Ever
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