The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
we're out of white wine, toilet paper and windex... too hard to explain via text
I'm lit.While shaving my legs I pretended the razor was a tractor cutting down corn. Noises included.
Hey. I found $5 in quarters from one of those state quarter collection books. I'm using it for food tomorrow.
I had to rush to my room and get my vibrator off my bed i didn't want him to know how long it's been since I had a decent fuck.
The investigator asked if we were sharing a pitcher of margaritas. I corrected him and explained that we each had our own.
i don't know what happened by from the looks of her lipstick I'd say she was skull fucked by a rhino
Guess what happened to me today at work?
I have chlamydia. What happened.
Oh lets talk about your news first. Mine is happy so it should go second.
Pretty sure the cab driver can even smell the sex coming from between my legs
If there's so much of a hint of a whisper from somebody I didn't tell personally, I will cut off your balls with a chainsaw, cauterize the wound with a flaming rusty spoon, feed your balls to your dog, and feed them to you when he shits them out, capiche?
Drunk me Does not appreciate a drunk, naked you kicking me off the couch at 3am. You have a bed here, you dick
Because you stood over the Ice luge screaming STONE COLD and poured beer on everyone
I just found my lube on the ground next to my bed. I would pay money to find out what the fuck happened that night.
Immediately after sex he layed on the floor and acted like my yellow bra was pac man
It's not a walk of shame if you run
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