Boner jamz table deep. plus bar deep. wiing waing.
i may or may not be watching the land before time
He is like the real live version of the state fair..
Well, let's be honest here. You're dealing with gay guys... EVERYTHING has an emotional attachment.
you try finding a go kart track at 4 AM on Thanksgiving
I was really sad when you left and cried. And i don't know what a face promise is, but apparently i made you make one.
They wouldn't let me go to sleep at the police station while I was waiting to bail u out. YOU OWE ME
Totally just sport flirted the shit out of a girl on a wheelchair. I've done my good deed for the day.
She was telling me which girls she thought I should fuck or not at the bar. Why can't all one night stands be that cool after?
It's a system.. i get to hook up with them and you get to play words with friends with them afterwards.
Yeah I just gotta do it so that my major doesn't find out. Doesn't look good having a stripper teach your 3rd grader
I told this guy in the dining hall that he's a hippie god and he's never made eating yogurt so sexy
HELP! I GOT DRUNK IN THE LIVING ROOM AND CANT GET UP UPSTAIRS
you know you need to get laid when: getting wrestled to the ground in a self-defense class turns you on....p.s. this is a booty call
It’s the biggest dick I’ve ever seen. His IQ drops 25 points when he’s hard because there’s no blood going to his brain
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