Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(612): View more from Minnesota

Is it a bad sign when i blow my nose && can smell vodka?

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(216): View more from Ohio

Does this mean you'll turn into an Albanian at the next full moon?

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(617): View more from Massachusetts

a stripper queefed in my friends mouth last night and it reminded me of you. miss you

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(813): View more from Florida

They're donating plasma together for extra money. Couple of the fucking century.

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19 Characteristics That Make People Instantly Attractive
Read it at the TFLN blog
(440): View more from Ohio

I woke up with the new contact "Britney Both Nipples Pierced"... how do you think the night went?

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(660): View more from Missouri

Things I love twice as much when drunk: Taco Bell. Office chairs that roll. Classes.

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(613): View more from Ontario

She said I walked up to the McDonalds counter and ordered just a cup full of pickles then proceeded to offer some to everyone in the place.

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(626): View more from California

The bros used their bong water as pong water but I walked in mid game and didn't know so they hit our first cup and I chugged it.

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(905): View more from Ontario

Random pof guy just messaged me initiating a Pokemon battle. Want to be a bridesmaid?

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