carls jr on main st. japanese tourist taking a dump in the urinal. reading a japanese newspaper and wearing a full suit.
be there in 3 mins
Just passed a strip club with a Marquis sign that said 'tis the squeezin'
i feel like his penis is a security blanet. i cant fall asleep unless its in my hand
I love him. He's like the father I never had that I kind of want to fuck.
25 People Didn’t Realize They Were Talking To Someone Famous
Hmmm just stalked him and according to his facebook he wants "whatever he can get." obviously he'd be open to the idea.
we are currently watching a singalong porn...just thought you should know
Apparently I used ziplock bags to smuggle my drink out with. By pouring it in one, then cut the corner like it was an icing bag later that night. What is wrong with me?
he said he did everything he could to puke on his nurses because they were doing everything wrong
Cute underage boy is in my house.
OH MY GOD. DON'T DO ANYTHING. WHY IS HE IN YOUR HOUSE.
21 People Tragically Stumbled Upon A Dead Body
I literally just biked home like I was on the last leg about to win the tour du France. Fuck diarrhea
Everyone loves nachos, first of all. Second, Ke$ha is entirely appropriate for the age grou too young to realize she probably has Hep C.
I started dipping tositos in my screwdriver last night
then apparently I went "not bad" and continued
This will always be remembered as the Christmas I had 15 Russians sing christmas carols to me at 130am alone in a gas station while I was stoned on pot brownies
Well I'm going to hell. But I'm going after multiple orgasms.
She just kept roaring and saying Katy Perry had nothing on her. Wtf did she take?